“How are you?”
This is probably my most dreaded question.
After five years of living with lupus, I really don’t have a good answer. Not one that is expected of me anyways. I really just want to say the truth and answer “absolutely shitty” and be done with it. After all, how does one think a person who is sick 24/7 is doing? Not better. Not fine. Not good. Never. Good.
Over the years, I have tried to find a way to answer this innocuous question with some grace. But with the holidays, it has become a real source of stress. While I have become quite comfortable with my regular rotation of acquaintances (i.e., medical staff), the holidays bring on more personal social interaction which solicits inquiries about my well being. I really hate it. I have been able to come up with some story about how sick I was, how I’m doing better, onwards with life….! But it’s all gibberish. I am sick. I feel like absolute crap all the time! Can I just say that?
I wish that people would ask me more concrete questions that I can answer with more sincerity. Such as —
– “How was your day? Week? “
– “How is Harry? How is being a mom?”
– “What are some of your recent doctor visits?”
– “How do you like staying at home?”
– “Have you found some hobbies you can do?”
– “What have you been writing about on your blog lately?”
These types of defined questions, I can answer. Just don’t ask me an open ended question of how I am. I mean, can anyone really answer that?
(I wrote about my thoughts on greetings here: https://lupieliving.com/2014/12/03/greetings/)
