This past weekend, I went to a local fair with my family. While it was great fun, it was hard for me to keep up. I was in my usual state of sickness, fatigue and pain. I was starting to feel a bit down but then I remembered the last time I was at the same fair. I was barely able to walk and I had to use my son’s stroller for assistance. Never mind that I barely lasted a few minutes before I had to sit and rest. Since I am sick all the time, it’s hard to realize that there has been any improvement at all. You almost need a repeated event to know how your body is changing. Like realizing your favorite jeans are too snug even though you didn’t know you were gaining weight.
Taking a minute to appreciate that my body is allowing me to do more than before made my day at the fair much better. Even though walking was painful, and I still had to rest a lot, it was still better than before and that was something to be grateful for.
I try hard to listen to my body and be mindful of what it’s saying to me. When I was first diagnosed with lupus, I ignored the whispers of my body. This might have been okay when I wasn’t sick, but with a chronic illness, not listening could resukt in life threatening consequences. I have to admit, I listen out of fear more than anything else. It was nice, however, that this time, my body was whispering sweet hopeful tunes.