living with lupus, day by day, moment by moment

I was flipping through a magazine in the doctor’s waiting room when I came across this ad:



I felt a flood of emotions. 

After all, I AM a mom who has to take a sick day, every single day. 

I felt ashamed.  “That’s right.  As a mom, I should not be taking sick days.  I should be doing more!” 

I felt angry.  “But I am sick! All the time.  I cannot become ‘unsick’ by simply taking a cold medicine and sleeping it off.” 

I felt indignant.  “I am sick everyday, but I still do a lot as a mom.” 

I felt torn.  “I should take sick days from parenting more because I really need to.” OR “I should take less sick days from parenting because my child needs me.”

I felt resentful.  “Why can’t I have a curable illness?”

I felt sad.  “I am not even a mom, being sick all the time.”

I felt defensive. “The only times I call in sick is when I’m so ill that I have been vomiting for eight hours straight.  Otherwise, even though I’m sick, I power through.”

I understand that chronically sick moms are not the core target audience for this ad.  I understand this ad never intended to promise a cure beyond that of the common cold/flu.  

Yet . . . YET . . . this idea that a mom needs to do everything in her power to get well because a mom cannot take a sick day from parenting really struck such a nerve with me. 

2 thoughts on “Moms Don’t Take Sick Days

  1. Kerry says:

    Yes such advertisements do bring up a barrage of emotions particularly for those of us wh deal with chronic illness. Just the whole idea that mom’s have no room to get sick is an interesting commentary on our culture. I’ve had to come to peace with the fact that even on days when I’m not able to move from my bed or chair, I am still of value, I am still contributing. As I’ve had to learn to resist the temptation to harbor negative and false, feeling bad, sorry or resentful thoughts I’ve learned to acknowledge I can still raise the vibration in my home. Love to you on your journey.


    1. I still have a lot to learn about being a mom with a chronic illness. Thank you for your comment. It was very helpful to me. xo


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